Because I care about the well being of most everyone and you should really consider reflecting on what personal changes you can make to your own mind set to achieve the goals you want. Like it or not dating is a game of selling yourself. If your goal is to find someone amazing you need to be amazing and the first step to that is to be honest and stop externalizing deficiencies in your own personality and outlook. If you push deficiencies on to external forces or people you only infantilize yourself and rob yourself of your own agency before you even get started. No you can’t control everything and everyone has setbacks but these are by definition beyond your control so don’t waste time on them, they aren’t even worth the mental effort to think about. Focus only on the things you can control and those are things about yourself. Don’t carry baggage with you that you don’t need. No one can tell you to drop the extra emotions baggage you carry with you, you need to figure that out in you own time. When you do that then you become someone people want to be with because they will sense that you are a person you want to be with